Mega Moan 2012

January 20th, 2012



You won’t believe it but a week or two ago I was full of the joys of the new year. “Bring it on!” I thought. “Go Team 2012! Woo-hoo! New year, new start!” I cheered to myself. Thankfully it only took a day or two to wear off, but luckily it did and I was back to my old cynical self before long. I like to think that brief period of optimism was a inbuilt function of my brain to carry me over the most depressing day of the year (January the 3rd is what most people claim) without imploding.


To celebrate shaking off the Optimism Flu, I thought I’d start off the year blog-wise with a look at the top three things I’m going to hate in 2012. I could complain about stuff happening right now (the stupid indecisive weather, the cost of heating oil if it ever does get cold, my cats insanely expensive tooth problems) but no. I’ve got bigger fish to fry.

Right. Down to brass tacks. Number one – it’s the big one.

1. The 2012 Olympics

Yeah, yeah I know. If you don’t live in London it probably looks like a lovely idea. If you do live in London you’ve probably sub-let your flat for a £1000 a week so you can fund an amazing holiday away from the crowds.

I live in London. I can’t sub-let my flat: no-one would have it. And besides, Crouch End is no where near the Olympic site. But, lucky me, I’ll be working in Central London during the summer. Going to work will be like entering the seventh circle of Hades, only with more sweat, tourists and delayed tube trains. Big woop.

2. The End of the World

So apparently the Mayan calender ends in 2012. Which some people on the internet take to mean the world is ending this year. I take it to mean that the Mayan’s ran out of ink, paper, or interest by the time they got to 2012 which was pretty darn far in the future for them to be even thinking about. I also can’t help thinking that if there is a slim chance those naysayers are right, there’s no point worrying about it. It’s the end of the world, right, not the supermarket running out of milk. You can’t stockpile for this one.

3. Slow Walkers

I know it’s not exactly 2012 specific, but this one gets me every time. And I can guarantee that when I’m running out for my lunch break come Olympic time, the centre of London is going to a world full of slow walkers, strollers, perambulators, window shoppers… Bah humbug, 2012!

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